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 Post subject: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#1  PostPosted: 27 Mar 2011 13:37 
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Looking for Love in all the Wrong Places!

OK, for those of you who have read my posts over the last few years that I have participated in FSUW forums, you will know that I usually write that the first advice I give a man is not to go to the FSU, as there are plenty of nice women closer to home. But, with everything in life, there are exceptions. So I was thinking that we might be able to provide reasons why someone might want to consider looking in the FSU and reasons why he might be better to stay at home. I would be interested in hearing others opinions on this topic?

  • Reasons you should look in the FSUW:

  1. You have a love of travel and adventure (both are involved in dating in the FSU)
  2. You are well funded financially and don't mind flying to the other side of the world for a date
  3. You thrive on cultural differences, learning new languages, and learning about other countries
  4. You are a nice person and have moderate success dating locally, but just want to upgrade beyond what you can attract in the local market (I'm thinking most men fall into this category)
  5. You have some kind of unexplained addiction to Russian women or believe the hype on the internet and have to go and see for yourself to be satisfied.

  • Reasons you should stay at home:

  1. You lack patience in a normal relationship (it'll take a lot more in a cross-cultural one not less, especially if you do not have a shared language)
  2. You need to put the cost of searching and travel on your credit card and you can't pay the balance at the end of the month (trust me, the searching part is the cheap part)
  3. You think all local women are bitches, fat, or undesirable (professional help is needed in this case)
  4. Your goal is to find some hot 18 y.o. who is 30 years younger and you expect will love you for life (this fantasy does exist, but better to realize you will just be a sponsor for a short period of time)
  5. You think everything in the FSU is inferior to what we have in the west so you will be saving some lady from a dreaded life (trust me, it'll be you who will need saving with time)
  6. You think the term "mail order bride" means you will actually buy someone (sorry, but slavery went out of fashion a long time ago)
  7. You are thin skinned (your relationship will be under much more scrutiny so get used to it)
  8. You intend to be a one week wonder, that is only spend a week with the lady before getting married (usually in this case in two years you will be wondering what happened)
  9. You have no clue what you really want in a women, but think the pictures on FSUW are hot (take some time and figure it out because a relationship based only on appearance has a short shelf life)
  10. You are a social incompetent and can't get a date locally (in this case you still might have success in the FSU, but you will be ridden like a mule)

Based on the size of the list, I guess there is little wonder I tell most people to stay home.


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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#2  PostPosted: 27 Mar 2011 22:13 
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I have to admit that I have never used the Internet when trying to find a partner.
I will go even further and state that I had no plans of finding a permanent partner, it just so happened that I was working in Russia and I meet a lady who is now my permanent partner.

Now if I go to the original post, the only point that I cannot accept is point 3 of the reasons to stay at home
Quote:
3. You think all local women are bitches, fat, or undesirable (professional help is needed in this case)
But then could it be that I may need professional help [rolfsmall.gif]


Image

A very good and informative post, especially for those that are looking for a life partner on the internet.

I will though also add that in my opinion much of the original post also applies to those individuals that find themselves in a relationship while travelling and they want to turn the relationship into a long term relationship.

The only thing that I will add is that in my opinion there should be another point in the:
Reasons you should stay at home
And that point is:
  • If you are not open to communication and you cannot comprehend different points of view then you are assured of failure.

It is just that as I see it there are cultural differences but there are also different points of view that go beyond the cultural difference issue and if one is not open to accept that a foreign partner will not be able to comprehend certain things that the non foreign partner takes for granted then the seeds of discontent will start to sprout.

I will accept that given time the different points of view issue will diminish and over a even longer period most of the different points of view issue will disappear.

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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#3  PostPosted: 27 Mar 2011 23:50 
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I'll agree, working in the FSU is a pretty good reason to look for love there. Then again, such an experience could ruin a perfectly good man from the abundance of choices you have.


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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#4  PostPosted: 28 Mar 2011 06:08 
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wicheese wrote:
Then again, such an experience could ruin a perfectly good man from the abundance of choices you have.

[accept.gif]
I will take it a step further.

When we were working in Russia my colleagues and I used to play a game called "I'll go to Hell".

The game was based around the sentence
"If she knew what I was thinking"
Because if she knew what I was thinking she would call the police and the police would wrap me in chains and haul me off to a dungeon.

I will though state here that the game was not a "contact sport" [wink.gif]

"contact sport" games had different rules [rolf.gif] personal to the combatants [smiling.gif]

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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#5  PostPosted: 22 Apr 2011 06:52 
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wicheese wrote:
Then again, such an experience could ruin a perfectly good man from the abundance of choices you have.

[yes.gif] there is abundance of choice (extra 10 million women) in Russia and Russian men are notorious of having many girlfriends on the side.

But can we really blame them when they are so spoiled for choice? [wink.gif]

Russian men are notorious age freaks and any particular reasons are hard to find. The prime for a Russian woman is known to be around 20-25 years old. A teenage RM (Russian Man) or of the same age are attracted to the same group naturally. A 30-35 RM do also want women from that very same age group. When a RM reaches 40-45, still tend to look at the same women age group. Russian men say that, women drastically lose their attractiveness after 25 years old. They give births, their bodies are sagging, their faces become less baby like and fresh and most women gain weight after birth. Russian “Quality Men” want a total, absolute, perfect doll that turns heads.

A single quality man in Russia would create excitement, competition and a big female fuss around him. When RW (Russian Women) say ‘there are no men around’, they mean ‘there are not quality suitable men around’. The male marriage quality material is scarce, not the men as such.

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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#6  PostPosted: 25 Apr 2011 00:00 
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Wiz, you are such "generalizer" [tonque.gif]

wiz wrote:
Russian men are notorious age freaks and any particular reasons are hard to find...

It fits more to most of Westerners who are looking for a wife outside their countries [tonque.gif]

The cases when a Russian man marries a woman that is 15-20 years younger are actually infrequent in Russia.


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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#7  PostPosted: 26 Apr 2011 12:56 
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In answer to the original question, I always think that May is a good time. [hi.gif]

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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#8  PostPosted: 26 Apr 2011 20:43 
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Vinnvinny wrote:
In answer to the original question, I always think that May is a good time. [hi.gif]


End of April and beginning of May is very nice time... when the bird cherry trees and apple trees blossom [tonque.gif]

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bird cherry trees.JPG


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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#9  PostPosted: 27 Apr 2011 20:51 
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Times_to_FSU: Ya ne mogu soschitatʹ
Olga,
A very nice photo, where and when was it taken?

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 Post subject: Re: When should a man look for love in the FSU?
Post Number:#10  PostPosted: 28 Apr 2011 03:42 
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Rasboinik, it is not my photo. I don't know when it was taken but it was taken in the city of Oryol. I will ask my girlfriend to take some photos of the blossoming rennet apple trees, there is an alley in the city she lives in.


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